The ultimate “sorry not sharing” secret to stress relief
The ultimate “sorry not sharing” secret to stress relief
Why it’s important not to measure your self-worth by your productivity.
On a miserable day in
“This is so good, I have to share it!
The book is ‘The gift of imperfection – your guide to a wholehearted life’. By Brene Brown. In my search for what causes people to stress. This specific quote caught my eye and I had to contain myself not to scream out loud “This is what I’ve been looking for!”.
The quote is: “We’ve got so much to do and so little time that the idea of spending time doing anything unrelated to the to-do list actually creates stress. We convince ourselves that playing is a waste of precious time”.
Can you relate to this? Does the thought of removing off a couple of check-boxes from your to-do list make you
If your answer is yes, it’s important to figure out why.
How you stress yourself out
How you think and tackle stressful situations will determine wether you’re stressed or not. Stress often coms from fears and I wanna share a couple of common fears with you.
– are scared of
– pride yourself on your productivity.
– have forgotten how to stop judging yourself and take a day off.
– ‘Fun’? I’ve never heard that before.
If you recognize any of those I understand why you’re stressed. Having to live up to those expectations can crush your happiness.
What’s worse is, when you measure your self-worth in how much you can get done on a Tuesday.
Visualize this… You’re feeling off and decide to pop open a chilled can of coke and take five minutes on the couch. You’re all snuggled up when your honey comes home and tells you. “Are you slacking again? If you don’t get all 12 things on your to-do list done by 6 pm, you’re a
How would that make you feel? First, you’d hide his beer so he’d need to drink water while watching the Pittsburgh Steelers.
This was a trick because your spouse wouldn’t tell you that. He loves you and understands your needs. Yet, you know who
When you don’t allow yourself to take time off you tell yourself that you don’t respect your needs. You stress yourself out. In the story above, your spouse
If you respect yourself and your needs, why do you overwhelm yourself with a plate that full?
Your lack of
Why taking time off to ‘play’ will rejuvenate you
What do you think happens when being productive is so important to you that doing what you love takes a back seat? You run out of gas. When your car is out of gas you fill it up again, right? Why? Because your car can’t drive without gas. Duh. The same goes for you. When you’re running around doing errands you run out of gas. How do you
If you wanna know the secret, you have to do a drumroll…
Spending time laughing and doing what you enjoy the most, is the best way for stress relief. When you take time off to play and have fun, you’ll rejuvenate yourself. Then you can come back to work with more energy and a refreshed mind. You gotta admit, it’s a
Eliminating fear of failure:
Don’t worry. I understand if you’re resisting to make this change. New things can be scary. To overcome this fear you need to figure out what fears stand in your way of taking the leap and making the change.
As we reviewed, taking time off will actually make you more productive. There’s really nothing to
To replace your fear with something better, you have to get them out of your head and down on paper. When you get your fears out of your head and on to paper, it’ll be much easier to change them into something constructive!
So bring out
Now imagine you’re wearing a
– What fears hold you back from taking time off?
– Does certain peoples opinions make you believe it’s not okay to take time off?
– Were you told to work hard as a child?
-Were you told to only take time off if you got sick?
Way to go! Now you’ve discovered what fears hold you back. The next step is to replace your fears with kindness and
Choose one of the fears you wrote down. Answer the following question with that fear in mind.
– Is my fear realistic?
– Is this a fear that I’ve been taught b
– If I take the time off that I need, will my fear come true? Why? Why not?
Have you answered all the questions above? Good. Now to the final step. Replace your fear with kindness and understanding.
Here’s an example of a fear that I had:
Fear: If I don’t work hard every day and take time off to myself. I’ve failed. I’m not allowed to take time off.
Is your fear realistic?: Is it realistic that I’m a failure because I take time off to myself that I need even
Where does my fear come from?: When I was a child. My mom taught me that I could only take a day off if I was sick. That’s why I believe that I can only take time off if I’m sick.
See how my fear is actually a projection of something I learned as a child? What I learned doesn’t serve me now, so I’m gonna turn it into something that does serve me now.
Replacement of kindness: I deserve time to relax and play any time I need. Regardless of how much I’ve worked and how much I’ve got done. I love myself and respect my needs to rest and play.
Practice this every time you’re held back by a fear and ‘poof’ your fear will disappear and your stress will dissolve.
How do you like to have fun?
Can you name 1 activity that makes you relaxed and
If you’ve forgotten what a hobby is or how to relax. Now is the time to rekindle your love for that side of you.
List anything that comes to mind, that’s something you’d like to start doing! I found a list of hobbies if
Choose at least 5 ways you can play and rest.
I’ll tell you mine.
I love to paint and the feeling of walking inside a
Make a plan:
To make all this work, it needs to become a habit. Now that you know what fun hobby you’d love to take up again, let’s make yourself accountable.
Every Sunday I encourage you to take 30 minutes
If you think you might skip your scheduled
Now, I’d love to hear from you. Which part of this post resonated with you most and why?
What can you do today to turn that insight into action right now?
Leave a comment below and let me know.
Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts with me.
With great love,